Army Daze
by dabbling
Summary: Frank Goren manages to complicate Bobby's life from beyond the grave. Intent on dealing with the situation himself, Goren gets in over his head. Alex wants to help, but has no idea where to find him. Can she save him from his past?
1. Chapter 1

Army Daze

Alex let the apartment door click shut behind her and rubbed her arms with her hands. This felt so wrong.

The air in Bobby's place seemed stale, and although she could pick out the scent that was uniquely him, it was soured and turning. She walked through the place quickly, knocking gently on doors and calling softly, as if he would be there to answer.

Then she began looking for clues. She was in his bedroom, and so she started there. The bed was mussed, the sheets and blankets twisted as if he'd gotten up hastily after tossing and turning in bed. She saw no signs that he'd entertained anyone there. The nightstand supported a lamp, an alarm clock, and a bottle of prescription medication. She read the label. It was an old bottle of Tylenol-3, well past the expiration date. He was in pain.

The drawer of the nightstand was relatively bare: A little black book from days gone by, a few scattered condoms, a spare set of keys. She expected to find his switchblade there; maybe he kept it somewhere else.

Opening the door to the closet, she was overwhelmed by the foul smell that was overtaking the apartment: his laundry. Alex reached in and carefully removed the clothing, one item at a time. The items on top were unfamiliar, a sweaty jumble of workout clothes- shorts, tshirt, socks. Beneath them was the shirt she'd last seen him in- a plaid button down that still sported the stain where she'd bumped him and made him spill his coffee.

Alex sighed, and examined the workout clothes more closely. Finding nothing, she tossed them back into the hamper and closed the closet door. She rummaged through his dresser quickly, finding only an old photograph of the two of them in a desktop frame.

As she closed the door to his room, she was almost overwhelmed by the swollen ache that was building in her chest. She swallowed it back down and walked slowly down the hall, her eyes taking in the sparse décor. He had a bookshelf in the hall, overflowing with books, that held a few knick-knacks as well. She found an old ticket from the movie theater, too old to be of importance. She found a few more pictures, and then noticed the drag marks in the dust that indicated he'd recently pulled a book off the shelf.

Alex made a mental note of the size of the mark, and continued searching. His guest room was nothing more than a store-room, no bed, an old card table with boxes underneath and stacks of books on top. The closet held a few boxes that had obviously come from his mother's house: one very clearly labeled "Frank." Some of her clothes were in plastic hanging in the closet.

The living room was neat and tidy, except for the empty glass and used napkin that sat on the end table. Under the napkin she found his phone, and muttered to herself about why he hadn't returned her calls.

She moved to the kitchen table, which had one end clear, obviously where he ate his meals; the other end was a pile of mixed up documents. As she picked through the pile carefully, she could see that Bobby only opened the mail he thought was important, leaving the rest for the day he decided to purge and clean house. The items he'd opened recently were near the top: a few bills, a letter from his niece, and there was an envelope with a return address but no name. The letter was missing, but a photograph was peeking out from behind the torn seal. She slid it free and stared.

It was a picture of Bobby from his Army days, wearing desert camo fatigues and a beret. It must have been before he went to Korea: in Korea they would have worn green camouflage. Alex searched, but found nothing worthwhile in his smelly trash can.

With a sigh and a heavy heart, she took the photo, the envelope, and his phone, and went back out into the Brooklyn night.

* * *

"Anything?" Logan asked, and she could hear the voices and music in the background.

"I don't know, Mike. I have an address to chase down, but I don't know that it's relevant." Alex held the phone to her ear, unable to keep the worry lines form her face. She leaned her back against the brick of the building. "There's something wrong. I found a bottle of Tylenol 3 by his bed."

"We'll find him. You gonna keep at it tonight?"

"Just to run the address."

"Then get some sleep."

"I'll try."

"I'll see you in the morning."

Alex walked to the car with her natural confidence. The young men staring her down wouldn't try anything tonight.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Bobby rubbed his knee under the table, trying to knead away the pain that was gnawing there. He leaned back and stretched, then rubbed at his whiskers. He'd been waiting for two hours.

"You look like you could use one," the weathered old man said, offering Bobby a smoke.

He almost turned it down, but instead he gave him a smile. "Thanks," Bobby said. He leaned forward to accept a light from the old man, too, and took a deep draw. It had been so long he had to pinch back a cough.

The smoke calmed his nerves, though. He savored the cigarette, and his whole demeanor changed. He was young again, cocky.

"I didn't think you'd show," the man said, sitting down in the chair across from him. He turned it sideways so he could keep his eyes on the room.

"You look like hell," Goren said.

"With good reason."

"What do you want from me?"

"I need somebody I can trust."

"Look, maybe I don't want to get mixed up in this," Bobby said. He rubbed his sore knee again.

The man looked down at Bobby's hand, then met his gaze. "Maybe you already are," he said.

* * *

Alex watched as the address popped up on the screen. The name didn't register with her at all. "Celia Walker." She wrote it down and then typed it in for a search. Nothing more than drivers' license, and birth certificate. Celia was no criminal.

She sat back and sighed. Bobby rarely spoke of his Army days, except to talk about Declan. She really knew nothing about that part of his life. She stared at the picture.

He was thin and strong. Except for the cigarette hanging loosely from his lips, he was a picture of health. A smile played at his lips, and he seemed to radiate confidence.

She sat back and thought. It was before Korea, so maybe from basic training? Or shortly thereafter. That marked the first time in his life he'd been free of the responsibilities of holding together his dysfunctional family. Out from under his mother, no longer watching every moment for Frank to show up unexpectedly, off the grid as far as his abusive father was concerned. Finally earning respect for his intelligence. Of course he was happy. It was Bobby's first taste of what life should have been like.

Celia… she might have been an old girlfriend from that time. That would explain her possession of the picture. But why she would send it to him now… that was the mystery.

It made sense. Bobby would drop everything to help someone he cared about. Maybe she asked for his help?

Alex suppressed a yawn and rubbed her tired eyes. She pulled Bobby's phone out of her pocket and looked at his call list. Nada. The last call he'd placed on the phone was to her. As well as the eight calls prior to that. She switched and looked at the incoming call list. Again, she was accosted by her own name, multiple times. The only other name on the list was Lewis, and that was from two weeks ago. She packed up her things and rubbed her eyes again. Bobby didn't appear to have very many friends these days.

* * *

"I told you once already, I haven't seen him!" Logan held the man by the shirt, trying to judge if he was telling the truth. Frustrated, he let him loose. "Give me a lead," he demanded. "Somebody has to know."

"Try Ripper. He's always out by the entrance to the subway tunnel. Goren talks to him almost every day."

Logan gave the man a nod and wound his way out of the bar. His ears were ringing when he hit the sidewalk outside. The city sounds were a stark contrast to the noisy barroom.

With a frown on his face, he headed for home. "Damn Goren," he muttered under his breath.

* * *

Bobby limped down the street and found a cheap hotel. He paid with his credit card and made his way to his room. Once he was locked in, he hobbled over to the bed and sat down hard against it. Taking a deep breath, he rubbed his knee again, and then he scraped his fingers through his hair.

This was a fine mess he was in. _Fucking Frank!_ He thought angrily. As he tried to wrap his head around what had happened, and what needed to happen, thoughts of his partner intruded. She would be worried. He picked up the hotel phone and dialed her number.

"Eames," She said, and he could hear the sleep heavy in her voice.

"Alex, I just want you to know I'm all right."

"How bad are you hurt, Bobby?"

"Huh?"

"Tylenol 3?"

"Oh, that. It's just my knee, Eames. I'm okay."

"Where the hell are you?"

"I'm… I'm taking care of something."

"Something to do with Celia Walker?"

"You—" Bobby stopped, then. She had been worried. She was investigating him. "Yeah. Look, Eames, it's personal." He had to keep her away from this.

"Are you in some kind of trouble, Bobby?"

He sighed and glanced around the room. "No more than usual. Look, I'll be gone a week or so. I don't want you to worry."

"It's a little late for that."

He frowned.

"You don't have your phone."

"I know."

"I don't like being out of touch. Are you going back to your place?"

"N-no. I'm kinda… far away."

"Bobby, is there some way I can help?"

"No, Eames. Thanks. Look, I'll try to keep in touch, when I can. Like I said, it should only take a week or so."

"It's been a week already."

"I know. Trust me, Alex."

While she was grateful to hear his voice, this call was doing nothing to make her less concerned. "I do trust you, Bobby. It's all those other bastards I don't trust."

He dropped his chin to his chest with a smile.

"I'll be expecting your call," she said.

"I'll do my best."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The knee was the thing that kept him awake. Bobby convinced the front desk to give him some pain relievers, but in the end the pills just weren't strong enough to do much good. By 6 a.m., he was on the landing smoking a cigarette from a fresh pack, with a sack of ice on his knee.

Thinking back, he could have avoided it. Celia's letter had sent him into Frank's old neighborhood, and for some reason, he just hadn't been on his game. Brock had been out on the stoop, with a tallboy in his hand and an empty on the ground beside him.

"You lost?" Brock asked.

"Looking for an old friend," Goren answered. That's where he made his mistake. He caught the two on his left, but he didn't pick up on the one coming up behind him on the right.

"Ain't no friends of yours around here."

Bobby grinned, which was exactly the wrong thing to do. Brock was not one to be charmed. "Celia Walker," he said.

Brock finished off his tallboy with a long, slow, drink. He crushed the can in his hand and looked at Goren. "You in the wrong neighborhood."

"Not according to her, I'm not."

The two on his left moved in, and as Bobby turned to deflect their hits with his left, he was tackled on his right. He crashed to the pavement and took a few punches before they scattered. Once they were gone, he pushed himself back to his feet, only to find that his bad knee was acting up again.

He wiped the sweat from his face and turned in a slow circle, only to find no sign of his attackers. In anger, he kicked the empty can at his feet and immediately regretted it. With a curse, he slowly tottered down the block, forcing himself to put his weight on his bad leg.

It was just luck that he was spotted. Xavier called to him from the alley, by name, and he knew it hadn't been a wasted trip.

"You're Goren."

"Yeah. And you?"

"Xavier. You're too late, Goren. They shipped her out of here yesterday."

"What do you know about it?"

"I know she asked you to come. I know she's gone now."

The pain in Bobby's knee was seriously limiting his patience. "Where is she, then?"

The man slipped him a card. "Thursday nights you can get a square meal for a song."

As Bobby read the back of the card, Xavier skipped back into the shadows. Goren's body tensed as he recognized the handwriting. He headed off for the bus station, as quickly as his bum knee would allow.

* * *

"I don't like it," Logan said, wolfing down the last of his sausage and eggs. He was short on sleep, thanks to Goren, and like a wolf with a bad temper, he wasn't going to back down now.

"I don't either." She drank her coffee. "But he said it was personal."

"Personal like Tates was?"

She shook her head at first, but then she nodded. "I don't know, probably."

"Eames, when he went in at Tates, at least he kept you in the loop. This time…"

Alex squeezed her eyes shut. Logan had just put his finger on the very thing that was bugging the crap out of her. This time, he was shutting her out. "What are you gonna do?" She asked him.

"I'm gonna talk to Ripper, find out if he knows where the hell he went."

"I'm going to see if I can find Celia Walker." In that moment, over scraps of eggs and half-eaten toast, they had a pact. Robert Goren was going to have back-up, whether he wanted it or not.

* * *

Bobby ground out the cigarette and left the butt in the glass tray. The Virginia sun was rising quickly, burning off the morning fog. He adjusted his ice pack and replayed last night's meeting in his mind.

"You look like hell," he'd said. It was true. The last time he'd seen Kenny Song, he'd looked older, wiser, but still strong and confident. Last night he'd looked frazzled… if Bobby hadn't known better, he would have even said Kenny was afraid.

And then Song had looked at his bum knee and told him he already was involved. Shit. He was right. Frank had gotten Celia into something she couldn't get out of, and knowing that Kenny Song was involved meant it was some serious shit. Song worked for the CIA. He'd slid right from Army CID into a job with the Feds as easily as a baseball player rounding second to land on third.

Bobby had seen him on time since, about a year ago, and he didn't think they would ever cross paths again. Goren took the ice pack off his knee, flexing and straightening his leg to test it. The pain was more manageable for the moment. With a grimace, he got to his feet and went inside to get ready for his day.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N Okay so it doesn't actually make sense as either a sequel or a prequel to my story Treasure, it's just an excuse to develop my character (Kenny) I made up for that story. Sorry for any confusion this may have caused.

Chapter 4

As it turned out, Ripper was a nickname. The guy was a little odd. _Not really surprising that a homeless guy would act funny_, Logan thought. He was called Ripper because he ripped things. He was doing it now: had an old piece of cardboard about the size of a graduation cap and was picking at it with his fingers, peeling the brown paper back one layer at a time.

"Bobby isn't here," Ripper said. "He left."

"I got that part," Logan said. "Do you know where he went?"

"He left. Out of the city."

"Out of the city? To where? How do you know?"

"Bobby told me. He told me to take care of myself, that he was- he was going out of town."

The guy never made eye contact, either. The closest he would come was staring into the air just outside of Logan's left ear. "Did he say where?"

"No."

"When was the last time you saw him?" He picked away at the cardboard and when one piece didn't rip the way he wanted it, he groaned and flapped one hand in the air before setting it back on the brown paper.

"Tuesday. Bobby said 'Hi, Charles,' on Tuesday."

"Charles, huh? That your real name?"

"Charles Ogden Bailey. People call me Ripper. I…" He sort of twitched and hopped in place, then focused on his piece of cardboard again. "I don't mind."

"But Bobby calls you Charles."

"He said my mother named me Charles for a reason."

"Charles, can you think of anything you can remember that might help me find Bobby?"

Again, he sort of twitched his body before answering. "He said he had a bus to catch."

Mike smiled at him. When he looked down at the cardboard, he found that the man's ripping and twisting had transformed it into a tiny sculpture of an autumn tree. "Thanks, Charles."

* * *

Eames arrived at the apartment building in Jersey two hours later. She parked the SUV on the curb and referred back to the envelope one last time for the apartment number. Then, slamming the door shut, she marched ahead.

No one answered the intercom, so she started buzzing the neighbors until she finally got an answer. "This is Detective Alexandra Eames, NYPD. I'm looking for Celia Walker?"

"You got the wrong number."

"I realize that, but she wasn't answering my rings. Could you let me in?"

"You're a cop?"

"I have ID."

"I'll be right down."

Alex held her badge in front of the peephole until the door to the building opened. "Thank you, Mrs. -" she said.

"Stuckey. Linda Stuckey."

"Thank you, Mrs. Stuckey."

"No problem, detective."

Alex followed Linda inside. "Do you know Ms. Walker?"

"I know who she is, that's about it." Linda paused at the door to her apartment. "She lives on the third floor."

"Got it. Thanks again."

Alex turned and walked up another flight of stairs. Arriving at Celia's door, she gave it a sharp rap. It jostled and slipped back a half an inch, revealing splintered wood at the latch. Alex drew her weapon. She knocked again. "Mrs. Walker?"

The last rap of her hand caused the door to swing loose of the shards of wood that were holding it in place. She looked around. It wasn't exactly protocol, but opportunity had presented itself. Carefully, she moved inside.

A table near the couch was turned on its side, and some magazines, a glass, and a lamp were scattered on the floor. Alex walked slowly, letting her weapon lead her from room to room. Finally, she holstered it. She did a quick search of the place, and on the kitchen counter, she found an address book and a pen. The pen was blue. The letter she'd sent to Bobby was addressed with a blue pen. Alex picked up the address book and stuffed it in her pocket. Then she called the local police.

* * *

"You say the door fell open?"

"I was knocking, maybe a little too hard, but yeah."

The detective scanned the doorjamb with his eyes. "You really wanted to see her, eh?"

"Yeah. I'm looking for my partner. He's been missing for a week. I found her address at his place, and I thought maybe she would know something."

"Maybe they're off for a good time."

"Maybe," Alex agreed. This guy was pissing her off. "Look, I just wanted to make sure you guys knew about it. It's pretty obvious to me that something bad happened here."

"Or maybe you got a little too excited when you came in."

Alex squared off with him. "I came to see her, knocked on the door. It fell open and I saw signs of a struggle. I checked the place and called you. Don't bust my hump."

"Okay, okay, Major Case. Just leave me your card in case I have any more questions."

Alex pulled out her business card and waited for his as well. Then she turned and went on her way.

* * *

He stopped at a drugstore and bought a cheap watch and a brace for his knee. It was hard to gauge the right size, but he made his best guess and asked for the bathroom. It was a little too tight, but bearable. Bobby walked slowly out to the street and turned North. He checked the time. He was supposed to meet Kenny at 10:00.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N I'm trying to write this with some flashbacks. Flashbacks are in italics. Hopefully that will help clear up any confusion!

Chapter 5

Bobby bought a fast food breakfast and carried the sack into the hotel with him. He walked through the maze of hotel hallways and found room 113 at the back, near a less traveled access road and with a small parking area near the rooms. It was a smart choice for someone who might need to leave in a hurry without being seen.

He knocked.

"I didn't ask for breakfast," Kenny hollered from behind the closed door.

"You're too cheap for room service," Bobby shouted back. It sounded like nothing, but it was a code they had established at their first meeting. Bobby was alone.

Kenny opened the door and locked it back as soon as Bobby was inside. Bobby gave him a quick, manly hug, complete with a clap on the arms.

"You still look like hell," Bobby said.

Kenny allowed himself to grin, only for a moment. He dug into the breakfast bag. "Geez, Goren, what did you get me, the Grease and Groan special?!"

Now Bobby smiled. "You didn't exactly place an order." He snatched the bag away from Kenny and chose the items he wanted to eat, then handed the rest to his old friend.

"Good, that's better," Kenny said, dumping the remaining contents onto the square table. "You eat the cholesterol, I'll eat the rest."

Bobby ignored him and took a bite of a warm, greasy hash brown patty. "You don't know what you're missing," he said between mouthfuls.

Kenny began to eat. After silently wolfing down his sandwich, he poured Goren a cup of coffee from the in-room coffee pot.

"Thanks," Bobby said, offering him a toast with his steaming cup. He had a thousand questions, but this was Kenny's show. He got comfortable in one of the armchairs and waited for his old friend to fill him in.

"You know about Celia," Kenny finally said.

"I know my brother stole her money," Bobby said, his voice twisting as his face turned red.

"And you know she's missing."

"I know that's what Xavier said. Song, I don't get what any of this has to do with you. Isn't this just my brother's usual, gambling gone wrong?"

"Oh, no, Bobby. It's a hell of a lot more than that."

As if Bobby hadn't already deduced that much. He frowned and swallowed, waiting again for Kenny to fill him in.

"Your brother Frank…" Kenny wadded up what was left of the fast food bag and tossed it into the tiny wastebasket. "He picked the worst bookie in the world."

Goren hung on Kenny's words, committing it all to memory. Even the smallest thing he might say could pan out to be extremely important. "Brock."

"No, Brock was just an assistant. The real man behind the money was Zach Bonner."

"And he's the link to you."

"Bonner is a home-grown terrorist. He's running a savings and loan over here, sending the profits to Iran, where they're outfitting and training a new cell."

"Fucking Frank," Bobby cursed again.

"Bobby, your brother wasn't—"

"My brother was a royal Fuck! No he wasn't a fucking terrorist, Kenny. He was a fuck up, addicted to drugs, and gambling and women, and fucking failure."

Kenny nodded. He'd already learned as much in his own research. "Like I said, he picked the worst."

Bobby sighed and closed his eyes. "What happened to Celia?" He asked, growing concerned for her safety.

"I don't know," Kenny said. "All I know is she confronted Brock with something, and they held her in that house for two days, and then she was whisked away in a black Suburban. My people think she's probably dead."

Bobby's jaw twitched. "She's very sharp," he commented, remembering the girl he had so briefly loved in college. "She could… outwit…"

"Don't get your hopes up. Unless she can convince them she's got something they need, they will have disposed of her by now."

"Money?"

"Maybe."

"Where do I play into this?"

"Bobby, I've been on Bonner's trail for two years now. Just before Celia turned up, they doubled back on me. My cover's blown. I'm in up to my neck, now, but the job isn't done."

"And you thought I could…"

"You already met with Brock. They have no reason to think you're allied with me."

"But I'm a cop."

"Cops are a dime a dozen to them. You're a small fry."

"You don't think they'll put it together?"

"Bobby, unless you announce our Army connection to them, I don't think they'll ever go there."

"What do you want me to do?"

"What you were already doing. Find Celia. Then," Kenny added, "find out how they're getting the money out of the US."

"What about you?"

"I'm a ghost. You remember what Declan always said about the two of us?"

"He said if we ever profiled each other, he'd be in a world of hurt."

Kenny smiled, nodding. "I had you pegged a long time ago, Bobby."

Bobby smiled. "I'll need some cash. I can't leave a trail."

Kenny nodded. "I'll take care of it. Stay in the same place tonight. I'll get you what you need, and then you follow your head after that."

Goren sipped at his coffee and listened to Kenny relay all the facts he had on Celia's disappearance, as well as Bonner and the men who surrounded him.

* * *

_They sat down at the table to a meal of no less than 23 bowls, each containing a different food or sauce. Bobby handed Kenny a bottle of beer and a pair of chopsticks, and they each dug in, passing bowls back and forth freely and truly sharing the meal._

_ "I called upstairs," Bobby said. "They're moving in on Donovan."_

_ Kenny nodded. "It was good work, Bobby. Solid. Even Declan said so."_

_ Goren nodded, but couldn't really agree with his friend. The information they had poured over for the last three weeks was a convoluted mess, and though he'd pieced it together, it didn't feel right… like when you place a piece in a jigsaw puzzle that has a factory flaw. It fits, but it doesn't."_

_ "You up for the hike with me?"_

_ This shook Bobby free of the case. "Hmm?"_

_ "Songnison. I hear there's some actual wilderness halfway up."_

_ Goren grinned. "Sure."_

_ "We'll pack up after dinner. Head out tomorrow."_

_ "I'll have to clear it upstairs."_

_ Kenny nodded. Since Goren was the brains behind Donovan's arrest, he would need to be available to help with the interrogation. It wasn't usually necessary, but they had to follow protocol._

_ "Oh, and this came for you," Kenny said, handing a letter off to his friend._

_ Bobby set his chopsticks down and stared at the return address, written in his mother's impeccable script. With a passing glance to Song, which conveyed more than he intended, he stuffed the letter inside a pocket in his fatigues. "Thanks," Bobby said._

* * *

_ Bobby snuffed out his smoke on a crate behind the barracks. It was a warm night, and the humidity stuck to him like sweat. He sat down against the wall and leaned his back against it. Then he pulled the letter out of his pocket. The light at the back door provided just enough illumination to read._

_ He stared at his mother's writing. She always had perfect handwriting, no matter how disorganized and ridiculous her thoughts were. She could have typed letters; there were typewriters and even a computer or two at the library where she still worked two days a week. She never did, though. She always wrote out letters by hand, in perfect script._

_ "Dear Bobby,_

_ I hope you are not homesick over in that Godforsaken place. I am at my wit's end, here. The library has laid off everyone except the full time staff. Thank God the house is paid for or I would be scrambling for a job right now. I suppose I have enough food to last until the end of the month. Frank promised he would come by and check on me. He's so busy, Bobby, but he always makes time for me."_

_ Bobby put the letter down and took a rest, allowing his thoughts to rebel at this first part of the letter. It was so much easier this way. Via mail, he could bite off only as much as he could swallow. In person, his mother went on and on until he couldn't keep up; couldn't process it all; and he would erupt in anger and say something he'd regret and then the guilt would set in. Every conflict like that created new wounds, and nothing ever had time to heal._

_ It was much better this way, halfway around the world, taking her in small doses and giving time and careful thought to his replies. He turned back to the letter, reread the first paragraph. Losing her job was concerning. Although it was a miracle she'd managed to hang on to it this long, losing it completely was likely to throw her into a depression, and perhaps an episode._

_ Bobby frowned. Frank wouldn't check on her. Before he left, his brother had only come by the house twice in six months, and then only to ask for money. He ran his fingers through his short hair and had the fleeting thought that it was time for another haircut. Then he turned back to the letter._

_ "I hope you have maintained your Christianity in that place, and not been charmed by the novelty of Buddhism. It's not all it's cracked up to be, Bobby. God gave us rules for a reason. People can't be trusted to manage themselves. I pray for your soul every night. I just know you've strayed from the Faith."_

_ Again, he paused. He wasn't angry. His mother knew him well. He didn't consider himself a Christian anymore. He didn't consider himself religious at all. Sure, he still felt the heavy pull of guilt on his conscience, especially after committing what his mother would consider a 'sin.' But Bobby was always able to rationalize the guilt away. He had studied Buddhism on his arrival, and was glad to have absorbed so much new knowledge, but he wasn't a lost lamb like she thought. He wasn't looking for something to save him. Bobby already knew nothing could._

_ "I've just paid the bills tonight. With any luck I'll have enough to pay them next month, too. I suppose you won't be able to help, being halfway across the world as you are. That's all right, Bobby. Mothers sacrifice for their children. It's what we do. I'll say a prayer to the Blessed Mother that you will remember your duty to your family and to your God."_

_ He scratched his head again and read her final words._

_ "I will soldier on, my dear. For all I know, you've thrown this letter in the trash at the sight of my name and gone off with some Asian girl for a night of frolic and fun. I will pray for you, Bobby. You were raised right, whether you act like it or not. Frank will be my comfort, when he can. You have two more years of your enlistment. I will try and keep the house. Perhaps you will want it when I'm gone."_

_ Her closing was formal and detached, and Bobby sighed heavily. She was at the brink of a mental collapse. Scanning the letter one last time, he stuffed it into his pocket and walked into the city to make a phone call._

* * *

_ "I dropped off some groceries and the money, Bobby. I warned her not to give any to Frank, but she will, you know. If he shows up asking, she'll give it to him."_

_ "I know, Lewis. Thanks."_

_ "I'll keep checking in on her, if you want."_

_ "Thanks, Lewis."_


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_He had been excited, but now he was overcome with sadness. Without thinking, Bobby kept touching her. He brushed his fingers against her arm. He patted her back. He held her hand._

_ "You have to go, Bobby. It's the right thing to do."_

_ "I should have… thought of you," he sputtered once again, guilt bubbling over within him._

_ "No. It's time you thought of YOU." Celia turned to look him in the eyes. She raised her hands to his cheeks and kissed him on the mouth. "We've had a good run, Bobby. It's been a lot of fun. But it's time. It would have ended anyway. It's good we can end it like this, as friends."_

_ His eyes reddened, but he kissed her again._

_ "Send me a picture of you in uniform," she grinned._

* * *

"Eames," She said, trying to rub away the migraine that was starting behind her eyes.

"Hey," Logan said. It was as cheerful as Logan ever got.

"You got something?"

"Looks like he went to Virginia."

"Virginia?!" Alex cut loose with a stream of curses that ended with the word "Goren!"

Mike chuckled. "Meet you for dinner?"

"Mike, can you just come over to my place? I've got to go home, my head is killing me."

"Sure, Alex. I'll bring some food."

"Thanks."

* * *

She found the prescription and dumped two pills into the palm of her hand. She stuck them in her mouth and swallowed even before she had the glass filled with water. Then Alex went to her room to lie down in the dark until Logan arrived.

She was furious with Bobby. Not only was he off on some quest by himself, he'd gone 300 miles away by himself! She sighed and rolled over, cradling her aching head between her hands.

She tried to calm herself. Being angry was doing nothing to help get rid of the headache. She focused on the quietness of her apartment, and on the gentle darkness behind her lids. Gradually, the medicine kicked in and her pain began to ease.

That's when the doorbell rang. Slowly, Alex rolled off the bed and walked to the door.

"Hi Mike," she said.

"You okay?" He asked, noticing her expression.

"Migraine. I'll be all right." She headed down the hall to the bathroom while Mike went to the kitchen.

He dropped the take out bags on the table and started pulling the food containers out. By the time Alex returned, he was already eating out of a cardboard container with a fork from her silverware drawer.

"I have plates, you know," she said as she retrieved one for herself from the cabinet.

"I was hungry," he explained, and took another bite.

Alex dished some food out on her plate and sat down at the table with it. "Where in Virginia?"

"Norfolk. Or thereabouts."

"Okay, why?"

"Hey, he's your partner. I don't have the slightest."

She frowned. "Celia's apartment was broken into. She was last seen in Canarsie, as best I can tell. My source said she was flustered about something."

"So who exactly is she? What would have gotten her flustered?"

"She's a friend of Bobby's," Alex said, effectively answering both questions.

Mike popped open a beer and took a drink. "I'm ready to go to Norfolk, if you are."

"After dinner," Alex said. "I'm hungry, too."

* * *

The lights blurred overhead as they sped down the freeway. "Looks like she knew him in college? She wrote him a letter, sent him this picture," Alex said, staring at the old army picture again. She held it up until Mike glanced at it.

"Girlfriend?"

"I don't know. Whatever letter she wrote to him was missing."

Logan frowned and used his blinkers as he passed a slower car in the lane ahead. "For him to drop out of sight like this, she must have been something special."

"Bobby doesn't have many friends, Mike. To earn that title, you have to be special to him."

"To be a girlfriend…"

Alex shrugged. She had no idea how Bobby would distinguish between a friend and a girlfriend. Her phone rang, and after reading the name quickly, she answered. "Eames," she said, all business.

"Detective Alex," he said cheerfully.

"How are you, Lewis?"

"A little lonely…"

"That's enough, Ruzicki."

"Yes, Ma'am. What's going on?" he asked.

"You remember I was looking for Bobby last week?"

"Yeah."

"Has he called you?"

"No. He's not still missing, is he?" Lewis asked, worry creeping into his voice.

"Not exactly, anymore," she said. "He called me late last night. I guess he's okay."

"You guess?"

"He's… off… 'taking care of something,' whatever the hell that means. He says he'll be gone another week."

Lewis was silent on the other end of the line, forever loyal to his lifelong friend. Alex could read into the silence. In his place, she would have done the same. "Lewis, who is Celia Walker?"

"Celia?" He seemed confused by the apparent change of subject. "A girl, you know, of Bobby's."

"A girlfriend?"

"Not anymore… you know, years ago."

"When was she his girlfriend, Lewis?"

"That last year of college, right before he joined the Army. Why?"

"She has something to do with this. I was just curious." Alex paused and stretched in the seat as best she could. "Lewis, was he serious about her?" She asked the question, even though it had no relevance whatsoever.

Logan raised an eyebrow in her direction.

"Well, yeah, I guess," Lewis stammered. "It was college, you know? They were serious until it was over."

"Why was it over?" Alex asked.

"Bobby joined the Army."

"She was serious, but not enough to wait for him?"

"He wouldn't have asked her to wait."

Alex nodded. Of course he wouldn't have. "Lewis, did she stay in touch with Bobby when he was in the Army?"

"Nah. Last I heard Bobby talk about Celia was the night before he left. He never spoke of her again."

"Thanks, Lewis."

"Detective?"

"Yeah?"

"If Bobby wants to be alone, you're better to do as he asks."

Alex smiled. "I know." She said goodbye and hung up the phone. She smiled, thinking of Bobby's friend. She barely knew Lewis, but because Goren loved him, she loved him too. It took a special person to stand by Bobby, to earn his trust.

"Anything?" Logan asked, shaking her from her thoughts.

"She was his girlfriend in college, they broke it off before he joined the Army… that was that."

"Except the letter. And the photo."

She stared at the photo in her hand again. Bobby was so handsome in uniform. "Yeah. Except for that."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Lewis Ruzicki hung up the phone and set it on the counter. With an aggravated frown, he got himself a cold one from the fridge and went out to sit on his terrace. It wasn't much, just a ten by ten slab of concrete with an iron rail wrapped around it, but it was his. He liked to sit and drink a beer and look at the lights of the city while he thought.

As a kid, he'd never had a place like this. He and Bobby would retreat to the pier and stare out at the water until they had to head home or face the consequences. When his garage started doing well enough to afford a place in the city proper, he insisted on one with a balcony, even if it wasn't much of one.

Tonight, he thought about Detective Alex. It sounded like she was headed for a big problem with Bobby, and he hated to think about it. Lewis was Bobby's oldest friend, primarily because he knew when to give him his space. He never got into Bobby's business unless he was asked to. Alex, on the other hand, was overstepping her bounds. He'd seen it happen before with Goren, mostly with girls. They dated him, then they thought they were entitled to be invited into every aspect of his life.

But Goren didn't invite people into his life. Ever. And for good reason.

* * *

_Lewis heard the shouting and the cries before he even got to the front door. The screen door had blown loose in a storm and was hanging by one hinge. He wrestled it free and took a deep breath, listening to her words as she screamed. Then he firmly knocked. The screaming halted for a moment, then started again, this time directed at him._

_ "You're here to take me! You'll never take me! This is my home, I paid for it! I have the papers to prove it!"_

_ Lewis gulped in another deep breath. He knocked again. "Mrs. Goren, it's me, Lewis."_

_ "Bobby's Lewis?" She asked, and the door cautiously opened a crack. She looked and saw he was alone._

_ "Yeah, Bobby's Lewis. How are you, Mrs. G?"_

_ "They-they were just here to…. To take me, Lewis. They were trying to take me from my home!" She cried out in despair, her voice anguished, her eyes filled with tears. She stepped back and he entered the house._

_ Lewis closed and locked the door behind him. He watched her cry, and he was compelled to comfort her. She threw herself into his embrace and sobbed on his shoulder._

_ "Oh! Lewis! Thank God for you! My boys have deserted me, I'm all alone!"_

_ "Actually, Mrs. G, Bobby asked me to come by."_

_ "Where is Bobby?" She asked, genuinely confused._

_ "He's in Korea, remember? In the Army? He asked me to come by and make sure you're okay."_

_ She finally drew back from him and dabbed at her eyes with the backs of her hands. "Bobby…. Asked you?"_

_ Lewis nodded sincerely._

_ Her eyes bright with tears, she smiled. "He wants to make sure I'm okay?"_

_ Again, Lewis nodded. "A-are you okay, Mrs. G?"_

_ Somehow, he'd broken through. She sat down on the worn, old couch. "S-sure I'm okay, Lewis. I just… get a little lonely sometimes, that's all."_

_ "Bobby wanted me to make sure you paid your bills. Did you send out the checks?"_

_ She wrung her hands and he could tell she was beginning to escalate again. "The-there wasn't enough. I paid what I could, but there wasn't enough. They're trying to take my house!"_

_ Lewis kneeled on the floor in front of her and took her hands in his. He waited until she looked him in the eye, and then spoke. "I'll help you, Mrs. Goren. What happened to the money Bobby sent you last week? Remember? I brought the check over?"_

_ "I went to the bank," she said, calming because of his gentle touch. "Frank came to visit! He walked with me to the bank. Do you know the college didn't pay their grad students before the break? All those poor, hardworking students were going to have to sit by with no food or anything until school was back in session!"_

_ Lewis' neck twisted as he tried to bite back the words he wanted to say. "So Frank asked you for some money?" He said, gently, quietly._

_ "He'll pay it back as soon as the college sends his check."_

_ "Can you show me what you paid and what you didn't, Mrs. Goren?"_

* * *

_ "Bobby, I've been waiting for your call."_

_ "What's wrong, Lewis?"_

_ "You have to wire some money. You're mom couldn't make the bills."_

_ Bobby knew the reason why, but he asked the question anyway. "Why?"_

_ Lewis sighed. "Frank, Bobby. Frank."_

* * *

"Have you thought about what you're going to say?" Logan asked.

"When?"

"When you find him. When he asks you why the hell you… fuck, _we_… followed him all the way to Virginia after he asked you to leave him alone?"

Alex had thought of it, and had no good plan at the moment. She looked over at Logan with a grin. "I thought I'd let you handle it. We are in this together, Logan."

He chuckled and shook his head. "I'm gonna drop you off and drive back to New York."

After a moment, the light mood passed. Alex answered him sincerely. "I'm just going to find out what the hell's going on, and why he thinks he needs to handle it alone. As long as he can answer those questions to my satisfaction, I'll pack up and leave."

"And if he doesn't?"

"If he doesn't, then he's obviously in over his head and needs backup." Saying it made it so simple. Alex had convinced herself. As Logan pulled into the front drive of the hotel, she looked over at him. "Why are you here?"

"I'm your backup," he said simply and went into the lobby to book a room.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

When Bobby arrived at his hotel room, the knee brace was pinching his skin so hard he couldn't stand it anymore. He dropped his pants and peeled the thing off, simultaneously relieved of the pinching but now feeling a deep ache. He sat in his shorts and massaged it a few minutes, trying to get used to the new pain. He noticed the message light on the room phone was on. Bobby leaned over and dialed the front desk.

"Mr. Goren?"

"Yeah."

"We have a briefcase down here that was dropped off for you."

"I'll be right down," Bobby said and hung up. He rubbed his knee a moment longer, then put his pants back on. After slipping into his shoes, he took his room key and walked out, limping.

* * *

They weren't working, so to save money Alex and Mike were sharing a room. She brought in her bag and claimed the bed nearest the window. Mike followed suit, dropping his bag on the one by the door.

"What time is it?" She asked, feeling tired.

"Almost one. Look, you need the bathroom or anything? I think I'm gonna take a shower before I turn in."

"Yeah, sure. Let me just get changed." Alex opened her bag and dug down past the things she'd brought for Bobby—his phone, his medicine, and some clothes she grabbed just in case he didn't have any. She found the shorts and tank she was looking for and headed off to the bathroom. After she came out, she brushed her teeth while Logan got in the shower.

Alex walked over and stare out the window at the night. She found herself wondering where Bobby was, what he was doing.

* * *

He set the briefcase on the bed and opened it. A note from Song was on top of the cash. "This is more than my boss wanted to give you, but I stuck my neck out. Try to be thrifty, okay? I'll see you in a few days."

Bobby smiled. He fingered the money and did a quick estimate of how much was there. It looked to be about $3000.00. His mind began to budget, and he knew he could get by for a while on that amount. The biggest expense would be lodging, but he could manage.

As he stripped down and stepped into the shower, Bobby wished he had taken the time to pack a few things before heading out of town. He used up all the little hotel shampoo and decided to hit a thrift store in the morning, after he checked out.

* * *

_It was pretty easy hiking, all in all. Bobby and Kenny threw their packs down and sat on a rock, looking out over the village below them. It was quiet up here. Each man retrieved some food from his pack and settled in for a leisurely lunch. Now and then, the wind picked up, drying the sweat that clung to their faces._

_ "How's your mother?" Kenny asked, and Bobby choked on his food._

_ After he coughed, he looked over at his buddy, Declan's other protégé. Between the two of them, Declan believed they would track down every aberrant soldier in the Army. "What?"_

_ "Your mother. I know she sent you that letter. I know you hit town a couple of times last week. Is she okay?"_

_ Bobby grimaced. He hated to let people in on his secrets. He looked over at Song, who had proved himself to be a friend. Bobby sighed. "Actually, no, she's not."_

_ Kenny felt bad for bringing it up. "Sorry," he said, and looked back out at the view before them._

_ "She's uhm…. schizophrenic, Kenny."_

_ "Shit, Goren, I'm sorry. Really, I am."_

_ "Yeah, well, so am I." He drank some water and continued. "I have a friend checking in on her. I had to wire some money to cover the bills. He's gonna take care of it from now on. No telling when she'll be rational again."_

_ "How can you do this?" Kenny asked._

_ "Do what?"_

_ "This. Live your life, on the other side of the planet, knowing she's back there falling apart?"_

_ Bobby scoffed. "I could be in the same room with her; she'd still fall apart. It's nothing new, Kenny." An uncomfortable silence fell over them, until Bobby continued. "She'll come out of it, go for six months or so like a champ, and then it'll happen again." He looked over at his buddy, and was surprised by the expression on his face. "You're shocked? You mean you couldn't tell I had some deep dark secret that made me who I am? Some profiler you are."_

_ "Fuck you, Goren." Kenny was only half joking._

_ "I've got you figured," Goren said. "1__st__ generation American, son of Vietnamese refugees. Your parents never told you about their experiences there, so you studied up on it yourself. You've got brothers and sisters, a close family. Probably even had your grandmother in the house as you grew up. You were a straight A student, went to college on scholarship, joined the Army out of some sense of duty—to repay the debt your family owes America." Bobby threw him a sideways glance, and Kenny scowled. Bobby grinned in triumph._

_ "You forgot to mention I was a big football star in high school."_

_ "No, I forgot to mention you've never been laid."_

_ Kenny launched at Bobby, then, and the two had a spirited wrestling match on the top of the mountain. Bobby's size gave him the advantage, but Kenny was quick and strong, and much tougher than he looked. He managed to send Bobby skittering down the rock, giving him a bloody scrape that stretched from his knee to his ankle. Bobby rolled onto his back, grinning. "Ow!" He cried, in between spasms of laughter._

_ Kenny laughed, too. "I call that my quarterback sack," he teased, and offered Bobby a hand up._

* * *

A/N I sure would love a few more reviews. It's been pretty quiet around here...


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

He lay in the bed, mapping out his plan for the next day. The Suburban was spotted in Norfolk, which is why Kenny had led him here. He would pop in at the local precinct, show his badge, get access to their computers. With any luck, he could get on Celia's trail.

All that would have to come after a trip to a store and possibly a laundromat and booking a new room in a new hotel under a new name.

His head spun, working out different timelines, until finally his brain had enough and he went to sleep.

* * *

Alex Eames was snoring. Not loud or anything, but she was snoring. Mike Logan turned to his side and stared at her in the room's dim light. He smiled. He never thought Eames would be so entertaining.

Her mouth must have gotten dry, because she swallowed, and sighed, and turned to her side and it was suddenly very quiet in the room. He turned back the other way and closed his eyes. He did this kind of thing a few times a year with his partner, and it was no big deal. With Alex, he felt like a kid on a camping trip. He'd even gone back into the bathroom after his shower just to make sure he remembered to put the toilet seat down.

He shrugged into his pillow. She was a nice girl. He didn't want to upset her.

* * *

"Wake up, Logan," she said loudly. "We need to get this show on the road."

Logan groaned and turned away from her, throwing the blanket over his head. Alex smiled. She liked a challenge. She started talking loudly to herself as she lifted her suitcase to the top of her mattress and unzipped it.

"God, this bra is too damn tight. Good thing I brought another one." She rooted around loudly, asking herself where it might be. Behind her, Logan's covers slipped down below his head. He opened one eye, watching. Alex spun around and caught him watching her.

"Good morning, Mike!" She said, giggling.

"Awww, Geez, Eames!" he turned away and scraped his hands against his scalp. "That was unkind."

"Yeah, well… made you look. I'm going to check out the continental breakfast. Meet you down there?"

"Sure," he said.

* * *

Bobby sat outside, drawing slowly on his cigarette. His energy was up, but he was unable to start his day until 10, when the stores opened. His clothes were in desperate need of washing, and he wouldn't be taken seriously if he checked in with the local looking… and smelling… this way. He'd decided to buy a new suit. After that, he would get a new room, then head to the local. Once he finished there, he could hit a thrift store and a drug store for all the other things he needed.

For now, all he could do was bide his time. The cigarette helped reign in his energy. He smoked it down to the butt and snuffed it out in an ashtray.

* * *

She sat with her back to the wall and nibbled at her bagel. Mike walked in and nodded at her, then got himself a cup of coffee and a couple of muffins.

"What exactly is your plan?" He asked as he sat down.

Alex dug into her pocket and handed Mike a copy of Bobby's credit card statement. "You're going to call and check your balance, Bobby," she told Mike with a smile. "You misplaced your card, you know. Someone may have stolen it."

Logan grinned, folded up the paper and stuck it in his pocket. "After I eat." He peeled the paper away from his muffin and said, "You know, I didn't get a lot of sleep last night."

"Really? Why? I slept like a baby. Quiet as Christmas around here."

"Yeah, it is, except for the snoring."

"Logan?"

"You snore, Eames."

"I do not!"

"Yeah, I guess it must have been coming from the next room."

"You know, spreading lies about me is not going to put you on my good side."

Logan grinned. "You have a good side?"

* * *

Mike wrote down all the places Bobby had made a charge in Norfolk. Then he played out a dramatic scene where his girlfriend explained that her daughter had the card and was letting her boyfriend use it and not to let the company block the use of the card until she was back safe in the city. The credit card people bought the story, and he hung up.

"Nice," Alex said.

He handed her the list. "Let's go." Mike led the way to the car and climbed in the driver's seat.

* * *

They arrived at the door of his hotel room just as the housekeeping staff was stripping the bed. Alex walked around the cart and entered. "Excuse me, I'm looking for Mr. Goren, the man who had the room last night?"

"He checked out," the woman said. "Room's vacant, now."

Frowning, Alex quickly scanned what she could. From the trash, she saw that he had been smoking. A lot.

Alex turned to Mike and put a hand on his back as they walked toward the front desk. "He checked out, and he's been smoking."

"Is that a bad thing?" Mike asked her.

She gave him a worried look. "He hardly ever smokes anymore." At the front desk, they learned that he had no luggage except for the mysterious briefcase that arrived the night before.

They stood by the car and discussed where Bobby would go next. "He must be chasing down Celia," Alex said. "No other reason I can think of for him to come to Virginia."

"He won't want to carry a briefcase around."

"He will if he has to."

"I say we check other hotels in walking distance, maybe he'll take care of that first."

"Thrift stores," Alex said, shaking her head. "He'll need some clothes by now."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

He closed the briefcase inside the top drawer of the dresser. Then he opened the suitcase and rooted through the clothes until he found the plastic package of underwear. After a quick shower, Bobby put on the new underwear and the new suit. The rest of the clothes were all used from the thrift store. He spent a few minutes cutting the tags off with his switchblade. He stocked his wallet with a couple hundred dollars in cash and put it in his pocket. As he combed his hair, he looked at himself in the mirror: Cheap watch, cheap suit, cheap shoes. Anyone who knew him would be shocked.

With his switchblade in one pocket and his badge in the other, he headed out to the local police station.

* * *

"Tall, curly hair, pretty gray?" Alex asked.

The store clerk nodded. "He was just here a while ago. Big guy! I was surprised he found clothes that fit."

Alex glanced over at Mike.

"Did he say where he was headed?" Mike asked.

"No, but I saw him go that way," she said, pointing down the street.

"What did he buy, exactly?" Alex asked.

The clerk closed her eyes. "A suitcase. And a lot of clothes. I thought he lost his luggage on a flight or something. I felt sorry for him. He was limping pretty bad, too."

Alex smiled. "He has a bad knee. Thanks for your help." She and Mike headed out in the direction she indicated.

Mike called Bobby's credit card company again. After a short conversation, he hung up. "No new charges."

Alex sighed. "He's using cash. Where the hell did he get cash?"

"The briefcase."

"But then who…?" She had a sinking feeling. She'd been wrong. He wasn't running around trying to solve a mystery on his own. But who was he working with?

"C'mon, we'll push the pavement, show his picture around. We'll find him," Logan encouraged her.

* * *

The Norfolk police were very helpful. By the time he left, he'd determined that the New York plates from the Suburban were now affixed to a stolen pickup truck in the Norfolk impound. The truck's proper plate number was in his hand. He stopped in a convenience store and bought a fresh pack of cigarettes. Then he walked to the park to sit and think.

* * *

Celia Walker could barely lift her head. She had convinced them not to kill her, but it seemed they really didn't care if she died of starvation or not. With some effort, she rolled to her side on the threadbare couch. The smell of dust and decaying foam accosted her, and her stomach heaved. She puked over the side of the couch, nothing but a tablespoon of clear stomach acid. Then she dry-heaved for several minutes. For a moment, she actually wished she would die.

* * *

After a quick and cheap dinner, Bobby walked back to the hotel. He needed a car. He needed a car, and a phone, and he hadn't had the sense to ask Song for either. A sour mood was slowly consuming him, and his mind just kept adding to the list: his pain meds, his service weapon, his Goddamn shaving kit. He walked to his room and let himself in, locking the door behind him.

Moments later, there was a knock. Bobby looked through the peephole and cursed. Alex Eames was standing in the hall. He held his breath and staggered away, trying to pace off the anger as his face turned red. She knocked again, and he returned to the peephole. All he could make out was an orange prescription bottle. Like Pavlov's dog, on seeing it, his knee shot a pain through him and he opened the door. He took the bottle from her hands and glowered as she and then Logan walked inside.

Bobby was already swallowing a pill. "Lock it," he told Logan, who did. Bobby quickly filled a glass with water and swallowed it down.

"You shouldn't be here," Goren said to his partner.

"Neither should you," she countered, giving him the once-over.

"Eames, I'm into something… big… here, and you really shouldn't…"

"Remind me something, Goren. Are we partners? Or not?"

"This isn't police work."

"But it's big." She glanced at the locked door. "And dangerous."

"It doesn't concern you." While he spoke, she was slowly unloading her purse of the things she'd brought along. He saw his phone, and then his shaving kit. Bobby stepped forward and retrieved his phone, quickly checking it as if he'd gotten any calls.

"I brought some clothes for you too, but they're back at our hotel room."

The word _our_ struck him like a punch in the gut. He quickly threw a dirty look at Logan. "Fine. Thanks. I'll get them tomorrow and you can head back home." _Together,_ his mind added.

"I don't know what you're so mad about. Obviously, you needed a few things. It wouldn't hurt you to admit you need help now and then."

"I specifically asked you to stay out of this!" Bobby shouted.

"No, I asked if I could help and you said 'no.'" She shrugged. "I never was very good at taking 'no' for an answer."

He grumbled something about it being time to learn and then faced her with a frown. "Fine then. I'll tell you now. Go back home, and stay out of this. I don't want or need your help."

She glared at him. "Fine. If that's what you want. Answer your damn phone when I call, Goren." She stormed out of the room, leaving Logan standing awkwardly near the door.

Mike barely had time to look back in Goren's direction when a fist landed squarely on his jaw.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Mike Logan grew up on the streets of New York, and if he ever went down, he went down swinging. So when Bobby's fist connected with his jaw, Mike returned the punch before he had time to have a thought. The two men grappled in the room, knocking into the furniture and kicking over the trash can.

Needless to say, Eames came back in. Somehow, her shouts cut through the angry fog they were both fighting in. Logan gave a final shove and went to stand by the door while Bobby flopped to a sitting position on the bed.

"Bobby, what the hell?!" she demanded of him.

He shook his head and held out a hand in her direction: _Stop._ _Don't._

She looked over at Logan. "He hit me first!" He said, jerking a thumb in Goren's direction. Aggravated, Logan went outside to walk it off.

Alex closed the door and turned back to Bobby. Now that the adrenaline was wearing off, her anger was turning to worry. In silence, she walked over and sat next to him on the bed.

He didn't acknowledge her presence, just sat quietly inspecting the knuckles of his left hand as he made a fist and then released it.

Her voice was quiet now. "I'm worried about you, Bobby."

"I'm sorry." He said, still with a touch of anger in his voice. "I never meant to trouble you."

She sighed, and put a gentle hand on his back. "I don't think I'll ever understand you, Bobby."

He closed his eyes. He had a million responses to that, all true, and none of them helpful. "Look, Eames. Just go home. Stay out of this. Please." His eyes drifted over for a quick glance, then looked away. "Tell Logan I'm sorry."

She frowned, but accepted his words. After her hand rubbed a few circles on his back, she got to her feet. "Keep in touch, Bobby. Please."

He continued to look away until he heard the door latch into place. Then Bobby threw his head into his hands.

* * *

Logan was leaning against the car when she caught up to him. "You okay?" She asked him.

He nodded.

"Well, whenever you have that figured out, feel free to enlighten me."

Logan gave her a sour grin. "He didn't tell you?"

"He didn't say anything, except to tell you he's sorry."

He handed her the keys and slid into the passenger seat. Once she was inside, putting the key in the ignition, Logan spoke. "He's mad."

"I do think I had that much figured out, Mike."

"He's mad at you."

She gaped at him. "So he decks you? What the hell, Mike? That makes no sense."

Logan shrugged. "He couldn't exactly punch you, now could he?"

She frowned.

"And your little comment about our hotel room didn't help things, either."

"What?! Why would Bobby care about that?!" The look on Logan's face answered her question. "No. Goren's my partner. We've worked together for years. He's got no reason to be jealous."

"Tell that to my face," Mike said, rubbing his sore cheek.

She pulled the car out of the lot, shaking her head. "This is ridiculous."

* * *

For the first time in days, Bobby Goren wasn't in pain. He dressed in casual clothes and an hour later, after thinking long and hard, called his partner.

"Yeah?" She answered.

"I… I could use your help," he said. "From a distance, though."

"All right, Bobby. Anything."

He gave her the plate number and asked her to call if she got any hits in the system. "Easy enough," she said. "You want these clothes I brought?"

"No, that's okay. I've got a decent wardrobe now."

"Anything else?"

"Did you… apologize to Logan for me?"

"Yeah. He seems okay."

"Thanks."

"I'll call you once I know something."

"Thanks, Alex." After he hung up the phone, he sat in thought a minute more. As a NYPD cop, Alex searching for Celia was perfectly acceptable. Like Kenny said, cops were small potatoes to these terrorists. He could trust Alex to work the case from Celia's end, and he would tackle it from the other end. Bobby grabbed his smokes and his lighter and hit the pavement.

* * *

"He wants me to go home."

"No surprise there."

"You should go, Mike. I can take care of Bobby, if he'll let me. I'm sorry I dragged you into this," she said, eyeing the bruise on his cheek.

"Look, Alex, you didn't ask me along, I came because I wanted to. And it doesn't bother me that Goren was pissed. I should have expected it."

"Be realistic, Mike. How much is he going to let you help if you do stay? I don't want you to hang around just to be some kind of punching bag."

"Hey," Logan said, taking her hand gently in his, "I can take care of myself. What did he ask you to do for him, anyway?"

Alex was uncomfortable with his touch. She pulled away from his grip and told him about the plate number and the Suburban.

"Sweet," he said. "I'll fire up the laptop."

Alex watched him walk over to the desk and open the lid of the laptop. Her mind was reeling. Was Bobby jealous of Mike? And did Mike mean anything by taking her hand? Or what about what he said the other night, about being her backup? She rubbed her temples. She could feel another migraine coming on.

* * *

The city had an ordinance against smoking indoors, so Bobby alternated between a drink inside and a smoke outside. He minded his own business, but his ears were alert. He picked up on a few gamblers' conversations and decided to fall in with them, and see where it would lead.

"I'd sure love to put one down on that race," he said, inhaling deeply and shaking his head with a smile. "It's hard, you know, when you travel."

"You're from out of town?"

"New York City. I'm here on business for a week." He took another draw of his cigarette and shook his head again. "I sure would love to lay one down," he repeated.

"A week?" Bobby nodded. "I could let you in. One time only, you know."

"Really? That'd be great!"

"What'd you got?"

"A grand. On Marcello."

"Marcello, hey?"

"He's a well-trained horse."

"You don't do this very often, do you?"

"Sure I do. It's my hobby. Some guys play the lottery; I play the horses."

"But you haven't won yet."

"Not big, no… but when I do…"

"This is Hargett. He holds the money. You give us the grand plus ten percent. You win, you keep all but ten percent. You lose, you're already square."

"All right," Bobby said. "Sounds reasonable."

"How soon can you get the money?"

"T-tomorrow."

"We need something, you know, good faith."

Bobby extracted his wallet from his pocket. His fingers worked a hundred's worth of twenties out and he handed them over. "Marcello," Bobby said.

The man smiled, and Hargett took Bobby's money. "Marcello."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

_ "You always look at the big picture, Bobby. A horse is more than the sum of its parts."_

_ "Jesus Christ, Frank. Now you're fucking up Aristotle."_

_ "Shut up, Bobby! I'm trying to teach you something, here. This could save your ass one day!"_

_ "Really? Knowing how to pick a fucking horse is going to save my ass one day? What kind of a fucking fantasy world are you living in, Frank? Do you not see how fucked up we are? You, me, Mom?!"_

_ "Shut up and listen, Bobby!"_

_ And Bobby lit a cigarette and shut up while his brother explained the importance of breeding and training in picking a racehorse. He even plugged it all in to a mathematical formula. Finished, he stood beaming in front of his little brother._

_ "Well?" Frank asked, expectantly._

_ Bobby snubbed out his cigarette and got to his feet. He looked down at his big brother, dressed in used clothes, his shoes full of holes. "How's it been working for you, Frank?" he asked bitterly, and walked away._

* * *

Bobby rested the back of his forearm on the skin above his brow. "This could save your ass one day," he said to himself.

* * *

It was a huge gamble, really. Eleven hundred dollars of the government's money, more than a third of the cash he'd been given, just to get "in" with the wrong crowd. Bobby chuckled to himself. It was a good thing he wasn't the one who'd have to explain it to the Feds. They wouldn't be happy to know their money was being used to fund a terrorist cell. Kenny would have to take care of that. And if Bobby needed more, Kenny would have to get it for him.

He moved to a new hotel the next afternoon. The pain medicine was working wonders, and he even decided to forego the knee brace. Alex wouldn't come after him again. He had his phone now; she could call him if she needed him.

This new place was a dive. Thirty dollars a night with a flimsy excuse for a mattress and "cable" tv. The tv had no remote. The room's only furniture was a bed and a nightstand. He could hear the prostitutes banging their Johns through the paper thin walls.

Bobby thought about sleeping on the floor, until he realized the carpet smelled like piss. Ah, well. He'd stay here a night or two and then move into something better.

* * *

"Bobby?"

He muttered some kind of greeting, aggressively rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He'd been sleeping hard.

"I woke you, didn't I?"

"Huh? Uhm… yeah. It's okay, Eames. What is it?"

"The Suburban was spotted here in Norfolk. Let me give you the location."

"Oh, hold on," Bobby said, and rooted for a pen and paper. "Okay. Go ahead." He scrawled the address as she spoke.

"It hasn't moved for a whole day. They may have killed her there, Bobby."

"Okay, Eames. Thanks."

"Bobby?"

"I'll be careful, don't worry."

"Okay."

He got up and almost fell over when his knee gave out. He held on to the wall until his knee started working again. Then he headed for the bathroom.

* * *

Bobby hung back and waited until the call came through from the Norfolk PD. Then he hurried inside. She was on a couch in the basement, too weak to move. He kneeled down beside her, his former love, and gently touched her cheek.

"Celia? You're going to be fine, the ambulance is on its way."

Her lips moved, but he couldn't hear what she was saying. It looked like she was trying to say his name. He took her hand in his. "Yes, it's me, honey. I got your letter. You're going to a hospital, honey. You're going to be fine."

The paramedics arrived and he followed them as they carried her out of the house on a stretcher. Bobby held his hand over his mouth, watching the ambulance pull away, his face stern. He turned and went inside the house, to snoop along behind the locals, and glean what information he could from the evidence they turned up.

* * *

"She's in the hospital."

"Thank God she's alive, Bobby."

"Yeah."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm, you know… I'm just… worried."

Alex bit her tongue. He didn't know how far she'd snooped into his life.

"You didn't go home, did you?" He asked suddenly, out of nowhere.

Alex was quiet. She couldn't lie to him. She wouldn't lie. "No."

"I didn't think so. Logan?"

Again, she paused, not sure what this new answer would do to him. "No."

"Oh." He couldn't hide the defeated tone in his voice.

"Are you sure you're all right?" She asked him.

It was one push too far. His voice raised in pitch, the way it always did when he was angry. "I'm fine, Eames. Look, I'll call you later."

* * *

She stared at the phone after the call ended. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Logan sitting, his eyes glued to a soccer game he'd found on the television. Alex combed her hair with her fingers and called back as she walked out the door. "I'm going for some air."

* * *

Logan was trying to lose himself in the game, but he couldn't help watching her. She was on the phone with him. Mike saw her posture stiffen, heard her lower her voice, trying to keep her words out of his earshot. He turned up the volume on the set. He didn't give a shit what they were talking about.

And then she hung up and she seemed so upset. She didn't catch him looking at her. Ever since last night, she was acting weird around him. No more joking, no more teasing. Maybe she thought he had the hots for her or something? She'd only given him the cold shoulder since he brought up the fact that Goren was jealous.

God, women were complicated. And here, Mike was only trying to be a friend.

He hung around until she got back, then grabbed his key card. "Look, Alex, I've been on the wagon for about a week now. I'm going out for a drink. I'll catch you later." She didn't protest, and he hoped his absence would give her permission to relax. It was like she was on edge all the damn time, now.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Logan was nursing his third drink when he saw the goliath walk in. "Shit," he muttered under his breath. Of all the bars in town…

Goren saw Logan immediately, and gave him a subtle nod, hoping he picked up on it. Then he very deliberately sat himself on the opposite side of the room and ordered his first drink of the night.

Logan saw the nod, and knew immediately Bobby was working. His spidey-sense was on full alert. As far as he knew, they'd found the girl, and that should have been it. But Bobby was still working. Looking around, Mike could tell he was into something seedy. He sucked down another mouthful of whiskey and nonchalantly kept an eye on Goren.

Twenty minutes later, a man walked up and patted Goren's shoulder. Goren pulled out his cigarettes and followed the guy out the back door. Logan waited a minute, and then headed for the John, which was down the same dark hall.

He hovered a moment, listening. When one of the regulars stepped inside, Mike hastily went into the bathroom and relieved himself. When he came back out, he hovered by the back door again. The door was cracked open, and he saw Bobby hand over a wad of cash.

He saw Goren turn as if to come back in, and Mike went back to his barstool. He ordered a beer this time, deciding to try and keep his head clear. Goren went back to his seat, too, and occupied himself watching a computer monitor in the corner that had the stats on the night's races at the local track.

Logan was piecing some of it together, but he had no idea that this was ultimately feeding into a terrorist cell. He drank his beer and watched the racing stats, too.

The feed cut from stats to a live video of the race. Goren got animated, leaning in, hands in fists, pounding against the worn wood of the bartop. "Marcello!" He cried in triumph, happier than Logan had ever seen him. Goren took a final swig of his drink and headed out the back door again. It didn't take a detective to see that he was starting to limp again.

Mike waited a moment, then walked slowly to the back again. He could hear the angry shouts from outside, and he could tell Bobby was in some kind of trouble.

"You're trying to double-cross me!" Goren shouted. "Winnings less ten percent! That was the deal!"

"This is the new deal," a menacing voice said, and Mike heard the distinct click of an ammunition clip sliding into place.

Without a second thought, Mike stumbled out the back door as if he was drunk, purposely swinging it wide and hard. The man with the gun was knocked off balance. After a quick glance, Mike drunkenly fell against Hargett, as well. He started yelling at Logan to get off him and tried to shove him away.

For a moment, their eyes locked, and Logan subtly tilted his head toward the street. Two microseconds, and Goren had at first refused, and then acquiesced. He slipped as quickly as he could down the alley and out into the street.

Logan smiled, and then turned into an angry drunk. He railed against Hargett, punching him hard in the ribs and in the neck.

By then the gunman had recovered himself. He jammed his gun into its holster and tackled Mike with the full force of his body weight. Double-teamed, Logan fell hard against the broken concrete that used to serve as a back stoop for the kitchen. He went down swinging.

* * *

"It's—It's all going to shit!" Bobby complained, as Kenny followed him into his disgusting hotel room. Bobby lit up in the room, not caring if he set off alarms or lit the damn place on fire. He paced incessantly.

"Settle down, Bobby. Tell me what happened."

"I placed a bet on Marcello, you know, to get in with them." The tip of his smoke glowed bright red as he took another draw. "I won. So I went out to collect and they tried to doublecross me."

"They knew you were a short timer, that sounds predictable," Kenny said.

"Logan. Fucking Logan was there," Goren said. "They pulled a gun on me and he… he threw himself into the fucking middle of things and I can't get ahold of him or Eames and he probably got his ass killed, the bastard!"

"Bobby." Kenny didn't touch him, but he leveled the larger man with a steady gaze." "Calm yourself down. You're not going to be any good to anybody like this."

Goren closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Then, as he stared at Song, his cell phone rang, startling them both. Bobby tapped the button and snatched it to his ear. "Goren," he barked. His pacing began anew, and he listened carefully to the caller. "Okay, yeah," he said, and Song could tell he was trying to calm himself. "Okay. God, Alex, I'm so sorry. Tell Mike I'm sorry, please." He listened a moment longer and ended the call.

Kenny waited, and Goren finally explained. "He's in the ER. He's got a couple of broken ribs, but nothing more." Bobby gulped a deep breath and then let it go. "They didn't shoot him."

Bobby's old Army buddy nodded his head. He spoke quietly. "He wasn't important to them. They bought his act."

Goren nodded. "But they'll be after me, now."

"They still don't know you're connected with me." Kenny folded his arms and sat on the bed. He almost laughed when the thing gave way under his weight. "Jesus, Goren, I said to be thrifty, but Good God, you could have gotten a place with a decent mattress!"

A shy grin appeared on Bobby's lips. The sounds of sex were drifting in from the next room. "But then I couldn't get my rocks on with all this," Bobby said, waving a hand in the direction of the wall. The two friends shared a quiet laugh.

"We'll wire you. You can be the crazy bastard who wants to chase down his money."

"I'll need a weapon."

"We can do that."

"And backup."

"I'm your backup, Bobby. It's going to work. We're going to catch them."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Mike was no longer at the hospital, so Bobby stopped by Celia's room before he left. It was the wee hours of the morning, and she was sleeping. She looked better than when they found her, but nothing like the woman of his youth.

He studied her carefully, trying to discern which signs were the result of time and which were the result of her recent stress. Worry lines, cuts, bruises, stretch marks… a lifetime had passed since he'd seen her last.

He looked away then, thinking it wasn't fair to be the only participant in this reunion. Bobby crossed his arms over his chest a moment, then looked back once more. Yes, she looked quite different, but it was easy to see the girl he had once loved in this older, worn, tired body. He found a pen and paper in the tray table and wrote her a note.

_Dear Celia,_

_ You were sleeping when I came by. I'm glad to see you're looking so much better. I'm sorry for all of this mess, Celia. I would give anything to go back in time and keep it all from happening. But you're a fighter, Celia. You've already beaten the odds by getting out of that situation alive. You'll be home in no time, and I'll come by for a visit when you're there._

_ With all my love,_

_ Bobby_

He tucked the note under her hand and gave her a timid kiss on her forehead before walking out of the room.

* * *

"What are you going to sleep with?" Logan complained. He was groggy from the medication, and his speech was slightly slurred.

"I'll manage. Now will you just quit complaining and take the damn thing?" She shoved her pillow in his direction.

He was propped up in the bed, making use of three pillows already. Reluctantly, Mike took the last pillow from her and started trying to tuck it behind his head. The movement was causing him pain, and Alex took it from him and quietly set it into place until he settled back against it.

"You're some nurse," Mike teased.

"You're lucky to have me. Do you need anything else?"

He blinked a 'no,' and gave her one more glance before closing his eyes for the rest of the night.

Once his eyes were closed, her expression softened. She straightened the blanket over him and went to open the curtain that hid the patio from view.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw his silhouette mere feet away from her. Trying to get a grip on herself, she scratched her head and took a deep breath. Silently, she unlocked the door and joined him outside.

He turned and looked in her direction as she came through the sliding glass door. She shushed him until she got it closed again. He was like a coiled spring, but giving the appearance of calm, a lazy cigarette hanging from his lips.

"Mike said they were going to shoot you."

He glanced at her, then looked away. "Maybe."

Inside, she was fuming, but she felt like she'd made so many mistake with him lately that she couldn't afford another. She kept her voice quiet. "I'm worried about you."

Bobby looked at her, then nodded. He sat down slowly in the patio chair and with a gesture, invited Alex to join him.

"I thought this was just about an old girlfriend gone missing."

"It's bigger than that," he explained, without explaining anything. Bobby jerked his head toward the darkened hotel room. "How's he doing?"

"The medicine will help him sleep tonight. He's going to be miserable tomorrow, though."

"I shouldn't have left him."

"He said he told you to go."

"He did. But I shouldn't have. The two of us together, we could have…"

"But then your… whatever it is… would have fallen apart."

He dragged on the cigarette and snuffed it out. Bobby nodded. Her hand wrapped around his fingers and he looked up at her in surprise.

"You're smoking a lot?"

He gave her a half-hearted shrug. "Smoking a lot, cussing a lot, fighting…"

She tilted her head and leaned in, until his eyes met hers.

"I feel like a kid again," he confessed. "I guess maybe I'm acting like one, too."

"This brought up a lot of old memories," she said. He nodded, and she continued. "Celia… you loved her."

He was surprised again. "A long time ago."

"Before the Army?"

Bobby stared her down. She knew more than she was telling.

It was Alex's turn to shrug. "Lewis will tell me anything, if I ask the right questions." She scooted closer to him and her hand tightened around his. "And Frank?"

"He was in this gambling circle."

"It's hard to think about him, isn't it?"

Bobby's mind started to spin. He was so angry with Frank. Nearly everything Frank did came back to bite Bobby in the ass. But in spite of it all, he loved his brother, and he missed him.

"Those were hard times for you?" A real question now, one she didn't already know the answer to.

"No, actually. They were pretty good times, by my life's barometer." He felt safe with Alex, and he tucked his fingers in between hers as he spoke. "It was hard ending things with Celia. It was hard to leave Mom. I worried about her, you know… but for the first time, I was on the outside looking in. I could see there was more… more to life than trying to keep my family from bursting apart at the seams."

"How did you handle things with your mother when you were overseas?"

"She… she wasn't as bad back then… the episodes were less frequent…" He licked his lips. "Lewis was my right hand. I shouldn't have asked that of him, but…"

"He was the only one who knew."

Bobby agreed with a nod. "He was the only one I could trust."

"And then you met Declan." This part of his Army experience she'd heard about. Declan, who stepped in as the father Bobby had never had.

He sensed her irritation and chose not to speak of Declan again. "And others. Friends. Buddies. You know."

Alex smiled. This was new. "You had buddies?"

"CID, you know, it's kinda like the precinct. You know, a squad, and people work with partners."

"You had a partner in CID?"

"Yeah." She looked at him expectantly, and he finally continued. "His name is Kenny. He's a good guy, a real friend."

"You talk like he's still around."

Bobby cleared his throat. He didn't want to tell her about Kenny's involvement in his current mess. "An Army buddy, you know, he's kind of like a brother. Or like a partner. You know, you're friends, but you also know you can trust them with your life. That trust, that's something time can't change. Like me and you."

"You trust me?" She asked in a whisper, and his fingers gripped hers tightly.

"Of course I do."

"With your life?"

His dark eyes stared into hers, more powerful than a spoken 'yes.'

"Then you have to let me in. Let me help."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Alex suppressed a yawn, and he glanced over at her. "You should get some sleep," he said.

"You could stay," she offered. "I don't come close to taking up all of a queen bed."

It was a tempting offer, even with Logan sharing the room. But Bobby shook his head. He had to get back, wait for contact from Kenny. "Look, Alex," he said, rising to his feet. "You'll get a call," he said.

She stood, and though every fiber of her being was telling her to throw her arms around him and never let him go, she simply touched her fingers to the back of his hand and said, "Be careful, Bobby."

* * *

It was close to eleven p.m. when Bobby went back to the bar. Thanks to Kenny, he was carrying, though he doubted he'd get the opportunity to use it. He also had a mic hidden in his cigarette lighter. The CIA was on the cutting edge—this lighter actually worked, in spite of the electronics hidden inside.

He'd given his phone to Kenny, along with specific instructions about if and when to call Alex. Her words had sunk in deep, and though he still wanted desperately to keep her out of harm's way, he knew how he would feel in her shoes.

He saw Hargett hanging near the back of the bar and headed straight for him. The man cowered and Bobby nearly pushed him out the back door. Hargett yelled, and they were soon joined by two others. Bobby held his gun against Hargett's ribs.

"You owe me!"

"J-just a minute! D- don't! Maybe we can work something out!" Hargett cried.

"My winnings, minus ten percent. That's all I'm asking."

"Whoa, there. You're a real stickler, aren't you."

"I don't like to be double-crossed."

The first man held his hands up and smiled. "You're not from around here. You can't blame us for trying."

"We had a deal," Bobby growled, and shoved the gun a little harder into Hargett's side.

The first man smiled over at the new one. "Go to the car. Get the money." Then he looked back at Goren. "That's a glock. A cop's gun."

"I have my vices," Bobby said.

"What's a cop from New York doing on a business trip in Virginia?"

"Missing persons," he said. "I found her. I'll be headed home tomorrow." He knew the other man was putting the puzzle together, but Bobby needed in. He needed them to take him deeper in, so he could find out more.

"I think I saw that on the news," the man lied. "Lucky she wasn't dead."

"She's a very smart girl," Bobby said in her defense. Hargett squirmed, and he adjusted his grip.

The new man came back, a briefcase in his hand. With a nod from the first man, he set it on a large chunk of concrete. Then he stepped away. Bobby reached out with one hand and popped the latches free. Then he pulled Hargett closer to the briefcase. "Open it," he whispered in his ear.

Hargett nervously stepped forward, and Bobby moved slightly back, readying his gun for use on any of them.

The briefcase opened, and there was a loud bang and a bright flash. Hargett tumbled backwards, holding his hands to his face and screaming. Bobby saw the gun aimed at him and fired off a shot at the same time Hargett knocked him off balance.

* * *

"Eames," she said, all business.

"Detective Eames. I'm Agent Song. Robert Goren asked me to give you a call."

"Is he all right?"

"I'm sending a car for you. Is Detective Logan all right by himself?"

"Yeah, he'll get by," she said, glancing in Logan's direction. He was dividing his attention between her and the television.

"We'll pick you up in ten minutes."

In that ten minutes, Eames had time to bounce what she'd just learned off Logan.

"Feds," he said, and she agreed. "No wonder all the secrecy."

"He didn't say if Bobby's all right," she commented.

"He didn't say he's dead either," Mike said, providing his own Logan form of encouragement.

* * *

Bobby was sitting very quietly, holding his gun on the third man, the new one, the one he hoped he could break. His left side was burning, but he ignored it and watched the man drive.

"I could be taking you anywhere, you wouldn't know."

"Sometimes a man thinks he's prepared to die for a cause, until he looks death in the face."

"Maybe you won't follow through?"

"Maybe. Is that a chance you want to take?"

"I could wreck the car, kill us both."

"You could have done that already."

"So could you," he said, nodding at the Glock in Bobby's hand.

"Do you play chess?" Goren asked.

The man nodded.

"50 moves, and we're at a draw, then." Goren knew he was ultimately at a disadvantage. If the man did as he asked, he would be outgunned and outnumbered. He had to hope he could get this man to abandon the terrorists, and either give him the information he needed or join with him to get it.

"What attracted you to them?" Goren asked, his first strategic move.

"This country is nothing but a pig, eating up all the resources of the world and leaving hardworking people to struggle and die of starvation."

"You've rationalized it, then. Risking your life for the benefit of the masses." Move number 2.

"There's right, and there's wrong."

"And killing for the cause?" Three.

"Could never even the score. The number of innocents who have been slaughtered…"

Bobby took a long slow breath, trying to bite back the burning pain in his side. He spoke again, his fourth move. "I was at the Twin Towers… after…" he paused a moment. "You know there was a daycare there? First floor." Fortunately, the children survived, but it wasn't likely this man knew that. "That's right, it still wouldn't even the score in your book," Bobby said. Five. "Are you Muslim? Have you studied Islam?" Six.

"I've studied."

"With your friends, in the terrorist cell." Seven.

"I've studied Islam."

"'And if you punish, you shall inflict an equivalent punishment. But if you resort to patience (instead of revenge), it would be better for the patient ones.' That's from the Koran. The Koran doesn't teach all this killing. People do that." Eighth move. Maybe he wouldn't need all 50.

He saw the man's eyes glance at him briefly in the mirror.

Bobby quoted the Koran again, "Hold to forgiveness, command what is right, and turn away from the ignorant." Somehow it was easier to think of this discourse as a chess game. Move number nine. Bobby saw the man's face screw up in thought. He continued, "… if you pardon and exonerate and forgive, Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful." Ten.

"Are you Muslim?"

"No, I'm not. But I've studied the Koran. It doesn't teach all this violence and hatred." Bobby saw the man's resolve melting away in the mirror. He was having doubts about his beliefs, about his actions, and about himself. He'd broken through in eleven moves. "You're taking me to them?"

He nodded.

Bobby laid the gun in his lap and closed his eyes. With his right, he reached over and touched his sore side. His hand came away covered with blood.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

"You're hurt, aren't you?"

Bobby's eyes opened and he sat up straighter. "I guess a bullet grazed me."

"I could just drop you at a hospital, forget about all this."

Bobby shook his head. It would be easier, but it wouldn't get the job done. At least the driver was seeing his humanity. He had a chance of getting out of this alive.

"Why are you so dead-set on doing this?" He asked, suddenly.

Bobby thought a moment before he responded. "I… catch killers," was all he said.

* * *

Alex sat in the back of the van, listening intently to the live feed coming from Bobby's planted mic. At his words, "I guess a bullet grazed me," her heart was in her mouth. She heard an agent behind her ordering a bus on the ready.

"Detective Eames?"

She took one side of the headphones off her ear. He was holding out his hand to shake hers. "I'm Agent Song. Kenny Song."

"Kenny?" She asked, and suddenly it all made sense.

"We're tracking them. Bobby's going to lead us right to the heart of the organization."

"And then what?" she snapped. She really was worried, and Army buddy or not, she didn't like the way Kenny was taking care of her partner.

"We'll move in right away. This is it, the hub. We break this down, we break the power of the cell."

"Why do you need me?"

"Bobby asked for you."

Alex was taken aback. _My God,_ she thought, _something I said finally sunk in._ She looked Kenny in the eye. "Understand this, Agent Song. I don't give a crap about your mission. My one and only job will be Bobby, and his safety. I could walk past America's most wanted and I won't give him a second look."

Kenny smiled. He liked her spunk. "I think we've got that covered," he said easily.

The van started to roll, and the team got vested.

* * *

His left hand was shaking, but he picked up the heavy glock and painfully slid out of the back seat. He stood up slowly, and blinked away the dizziness that was threatening to overtake him. He pointed the gun in the younger man's direction. "Lead the way," Bobby said quietly.

* * *

"We have the location!" Someone shouted across the radio. The van continued in its quick sprint across town, and in the side view mirrors, Alex spotted some cruisers and the bus following along with them. The team was very quiet, mentally preparing themselves for combat.

* * *

He wasn't even all the way in the doorway when he was punched and disarmed. Bobby writhed on his side on the floor, looking up at the men who would be the end of him. His young driver had been knocked across the room, but they weren't going to shoot him outright. Maybe the kid had a chance.

* * *

They scrambled out of the van and into strategic positions around the old barn. The lead agents had semi-automatics and helmets. To her surprise, she saw Kenny was with them. She was in the second wave, vested and with a handgun. The paramedics were waiting patiently behind the scenes. A shot from inside burst through the stillness, and all hell broke loose.

* * *

Funny, that Eames was who he thought of. He'd always imagined his life flashing before his eyes, reliving the high points and the lows, tallying up and hoping for a pleasant afterlife. Instead, he saw the little flash at the end of the barrel and he saw Alex. Alex, smiling up at him, on a warm spring day in their city.

* * *

Her training kicked in immediately. She applied direct pressure while the CIA took care that the scene was secure. She let go only when the paramedics told her to, and followed close behind and right into the ambulance with him. She stayed out of their way, but managed to keep her bloody hand on his the entire ride to the hospital. Now, they'd stopped her just outside the doors to the pre-op, and she was left stunned, staring at the Employees Only sign and wondering how everything could be so, so wrong.

A hospital worker put a gentle arm around her. "Officer?" He said quietly. Eames looked to the side, and saw she was still wearing the heavy Kevlar vest. She let the man lead her off to the side, so she wouldn't block the hall. "Can I help you get out of this?" He asked, lightly touching her bullet-proof vest.

She didn't really register that she got the thing off. He saw her bloody hands and pointed her in the direction of a sink. Then he even sat with her in the waiting room a while, until she finally looked over and said, "Don't you have somewhere else you should be?"

He smiled, then, and gave her a gentle pat with his hand. "I'll check in on you later," he said.

Alex's phone rang, jolting her out of her thoughts. "He-He's in surgery," she said. "I… Uh… I don't know." She walked out into the hall and read the room number off the door. "458, uhm, a waiting room." She ended the call and realized she needed to make another.

"Logan," he said, after three full rings.

"Mike?" Her voice was starting to give.

"Alex, what's wrong?"

She fought back the sob, but couldn't stop the tears. Her voice was strained. "He's shot, he's in surgery. Mike, I don't know…"

"I'll be right there." After she replaced the phone in her pocket, she saw that she was alone in the room. Alex Eames broke down and cried.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Kenny leaned back in the seat, his neck crooked over the backrest, staring blankly at the ceiling. He hadn't moved in an hour. Alex had gone from resting her head against Logan's arm, to sitting straight as an arrow in her chair. Her face was chapped and red from crying, though no one in the room had been a witness to that.

Logan wouldn't let her face this alone. He kept his hand on hers, even when she pulled away from him. She hadn't said a word since he'd arrived, and he had kept silent, too.

* * *

_Goren was grinning from ear to ear. He held a bottle up in a toast and quickly set it down and skipped across the room. She was tall and busty, though her uniform hid it well. He got her talking, and the next thing you know, they were on the dance floor._

_ Kenny wasn't as big a flirt as Goren. He usually spent these nights enjoying the beer and the music and getting a kick out of Bobby's happiness. Now and then, Goren would bring a girl over and introduce her to Song, and those were fun nights, too._

_ Tonight, though, a group of civilians was loudly protesting the military presence in their bar. Since Song was stationary at the table, he was an easy target. Goren returned in time to hear the last string of taunts hurled at his buddy. He flexed his fists, but he didn't budge. Kenny could take care of himself._

_ Kenny stood and met the man, eye-to-eye. He offered to take them all on, outside. The leader took him up on his offer. Bobby stepped up before the guy's friend could step in._

_ "I'm keeping it honest," he announced, and followed Kenny out into the alley._

_ What started as a fair fight between Song and the Korean ended up a brawl with Song and Goren and 3 others from CID against 5 locals. By the end of the night, they were in a lock-up and Declan had to come get them out._

_ They borrowed a car and drove out to the countryside. That night, sitting on the hood of the car with a case of beer between them, was the best night of Kenny's life. Goren teased him about his football skills, and they ended up playing a game of one on one using an empty beer bottle as a ball, until it shattered against a rock on the road._

_ Goren was a friend for life._

* * *

"You're all waiting for Robert Goren?" The Doctor asked. They all got to their feet, Mike taking a little longer than the rest. "He's stable now. He'll be in recovery a while longer, and then we'll move him to ICU. You can visit him there."

* * *

_Mike's first impression of Goren had been skewed by emotion. He'd been in love, and his girlfriend was wrapped up in a dangerous mess, prison guards keeping illegal prisoners, and Goren and Eames had fallen into the investigation of it all. He was trying to protect her, but he was trying to do what was right, too._

_ By the end of that mess, Goren had impressed him. He heard the rumors after that. He heard the rumors about Goren's sanity and his screwed up morality, siding with killers and helping them get off on mental pleas. Logan took it all with a grain of salt. Goren's quick thinking had diffused a mob, and kept them alive._

_ The girlfriend had gone by the wayside, but soon there was an opening at Major Case, and somehow a good word had gotten through to Deakins and now Mike was one of them. He had his suspicions of where the good word had come from._

"Are you all right?" Alex asked him, her voice scratchy from weariness.

Mike nodded. "I'm fine." Then his ribs betrayed him by sending a flash of pain through his system.

"You're a liar."

He bit his tongue and waited for the pain to subside. "I'm here." _And I'm staying._

She reached out her hand and petted his hair. "Thank you." Then he watched as Alex turned back to Bobby's bed, to the tubes and monitors and the very pale, very still man that lay there.

* * *

It was like meditation, really. A lot of silence and time alone with thoughts. And Alex really didn't like it. She liked to get out and be active, to _do_. She didn't like to spend any more time with her thoughts than she had to. Bobby was the thoughtful one. He seemed to enjoy thinking and brooding about everything.

For Alex, it was uncomfortable. If she spent too much time in her thoughts, she second-guessed herself; she had regrets. But here, now, in the hospital, there was no escaping it. Logan was a distraction for a while, but as his pain grew, his mood soured, and he was very, very snippy. Better to leave him alone with his pain than to try to talk with him.

And so Alex was left with her thoughts. Something had happened in the last two weeks. She'd loved him for a long time, but until last night, Alex hadn't realized what kind of love it really was. She sat back and pondered love itself for a while.

Love seemed to come in layers: from the simplest thing, like the love you feel for a pet or a stranger's child who happens to do something endearing; to the kind of love you feel when you are in the right place at the right time and somebody says just the right thing. Then there are those people who become a part of who you are, even if they only pop in and out of your life for a short while. She thought briefly of a little girl who'd been her best friend in third grade.

For Alex, there was always her family. That love wasn't difficult, was never questioned, and was unconditional. And dear friends, there were a few of those. Alex's best friend from high school, Heather, was one. They could go without seeing each other for a year and pick up right where they left off. This is the kind of love she thought she had for Bobby. She thought of him often, and fondly. She was also close enough to him, like family, to weather the storms and stick together through problems.

But something had changed. She wasn't feeling right now the way she would feel if Heather had been shot. Alex was actually feeling frightened. That was more what she would feel if someone in her family were here, in this hospital, fighting for their life.

And the other night, at the hotel, she'd wanted to hold him. Honestly, she'd wanted to pull that cigarette from his mouth and kiss him. But she hadn't, because she didn't "love" him. She didn't think about such things.

Alex looked down at Bobby, still pale and still from the sedatives. They'd removed the breathing tube, and now she could see his face, complete with the whiskers that had just cropped up yesterday.

His hair was all over the place, curls and swirls and tangles. He should have gotten it cut weeks ago, before all this started. He was angelic in his sleep, really. On an impulse, she ran two fingers along his whiskers and traced over his soft lips.

She didn't kiss him. She and Bobby, they didn't do that.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Song was in and out. Alex couldn't make up her mind about him. She knew how Bobby felt about him, but she felt he'd let Bobby down. She could see from Kenny's expression and his body language that he was concerned for Bobby, but it really didn't make up for anything. She didn't talk to him much.

Logan was finally convinced to make use of the hotel room they were paying for. He needed to rest in a comfortable place instead of these horrible hospital chairs.

She'd finally called Lewis, too. She'd been afraid to call him at first, afraid that she'd break down again and not be able to get the words out. He'd extracted a promise of a daily report, and she would not let him down. The doctors said Bobby was getting better, so there was no need for Lewis to abandon his job and join them.

Now, in the wee hours of the third night in the hospital, exhaustion won out and she fell asleep in the chair beside his bed.

* * *

He opened his eyes, but only to stare at the brass button that stitched the vinyl onto the chair. He stared a long time, as his mind catalogued the mixed sensations coming in from his body: dull pain, nausea, thirst, and an overwhelming fog that was slowing his thinking.

That's when he noticed the fingernail. It was manicured, and painted red. Sultry red, that's what Eames called that color. Eames! A warm happy feeling spread through him as he realized the fingernail must be hers. His eyes traced a path along her finger to her hand, arm, up to her shoulder, and he finally saw her sleeping face.

She was snoring, and she was beautiful. Bobby stared at her until he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.

* * *

"Bobby?"

He smiled when he heard her voice, and she smiled to see it. She watched him struggle and finally open his eyes. He took a minute to focus, and she waited for him.

"Hi."

Bobby's smile widened. For a moment, he closed his eyes and she thought she'd lost him to sleep again, but he blinked them back until they were wide and sparkling. He licked his lips. "Alex," he whispered.

She was squeezing his fingers hard… too hard, really… but Bobby was squeezing her back and he didn't seem to mind in the least. After what seemed an eternity of staring and smiling, Alex finally broke the silence. "Must be some pretty good drugs they have you on…"

He allowed himself to close his eyes a moment.

"I've never seen someone hurt so bad acting so happy," she explained.

His fingers pushed and pulled against hers. "It's you," he said. "You're always with me." In his mind, he remembered the beautiful vision of her he'd seen the moment he was shot.

"Well, not always, but I try, Bobby."

"Alex?"

"Yes, Bobby?"

Again, he closed his eyes and let his fingers convey his message in her hand. "Alex, come… closer…"

She got to her feet and bent down close, leaning her ear close to his lips.

"I love you, Alex." He said it, and she jerked her head away in surprise. He was still smiling, though his eyes were shut again. Alex stroked his curls with her right hand and wondered if he knew what he was saying.

* * *

"We squared everything away with your Captain," Song explained. "As far as NYPD knows, the Federal Government commissioned all of you for some undercover field work."

"Kenny, did we?"

"Michaelson broke it wide open, thanks to you." Kenny gave Bobby a nod. "He'd been totally brainwashed, but you raised enough doubts in him… let's just say when we tossed a copy of the Koran his way, he realized they'd lied to him. He told us everything he knew, which gave us the money trail we were after. We froze their accounts, seized the funds, and one terrorist cell is back to bake sales and tip jars for its fundraising efforts."

Song checked his watch. "I gotta get Logan to the airport," he said. Mike said his goodbyes, giving Eames a full on hug that she willingly returned. Kenny shook Alex's hand and gave Bobby's shoulder a squeeze. "I'll come see you in the city."

After the two had gone, Bobby stared sadly at Alex.

"Are you okay?" She asked, thinking he was in pain.

"You and Mike… uh…"

She looked back at the now vacant hall outside the door. "What, that? The hug?" The look in his eyes said that was exactly what he was asking about. Alex sighed. Logan had been right all along. Bobby was jealous. "This has been pretty hard on me, Bobby. I won't lie. Mike has been here for me, through it all."

Bobby frowned and looked away, but he was still tuned in to her every word.

"He's earned my friendship, Bobby. That's what that was."

Bobby looked back, the spark renewed in his eyes.

"You know, Bobby, when you first came out of it… you said something to me."

"What?" He asked.

"You said you love me."

He was silent, but he neither turned away nor denied it. Finally, he spoke. "So?"

She'd spent a week figuring out how she felt, and now that the opportunity was here, she couldn't tell him. He misread her hesitation.

"I do love you, Alex. That should be no surprise."

She almost laughed. "It was a hell of a surprise, Goren!" She almost shouted at him, but her eyes and face were genuine and happy. "But the bigger surprise… was when I realized I love you, too."

He wore the biggest smile she'd ever seen.

She put her fingers on the soft skin just below his jaw. "Bobby, can I… do something? I've been wanting to a long time, now…"

He nodded eagerly, and she bent down and touched her lips to his. Bobby's hand lifted and slid easily through her hair, then settled against the back of her head. He deepened the kiss.

It wasn't easy, but she finally pulled away. His hand roamed over her face, neck, and shoulder while she spoke. "So this is it, then? We're dating?"

He nodded happily in agreement.

"I have to tell you, I have a couple of rules, Bobby."

His hand stopped moving and he stared into her eyes.

"No disappearing on me. And no smoking. And no more getting yourself nearly killed. I can't do this again, Goren. I mean it."

He smiled and forced himself to sit up taller so he could reach her. He pulled her closer to kiss her again. "It's a deal," he said, his voice vibrating against her lips.


	19. Chapter 19

Epilogue

Bobby walked easily down the hall to the apartment. The good thing about recovering from his gunshot wound was it also gave his knee time to heal. He paused at her door and gave a knock.

"Bobby!" Celia cried cheerfully as she swung the door open and gave him a hug. "Where's your friend?"

"Oh, uh, she's parking the car. She'll be up in a minute."

She invited him in and she sat with him on the couch. "I can't believe it," she said.

Bobby grinned, in his shy way.

"I got your note in the hospital. My daughter found it, actually. She must have read it to me 50 times."

"Your daughter?"

"Oh, Bobby, it has been a long time, hasn't it?" She got up and pulled a framed picture off a shelf. "Amanda. She's 23, just graduated college last year."

There was another knock at the door, and Bobby stood. "That's Alex," he said quickly. He watched as Celia let her in, introducing herself and shaking Alex's hand.

"I parked and then I was half way up the stairs before I remembered this," she said. She handed a small wrapped gift to Celia.

Celia looked at Alex in surprise, and then at Bobby. "What in the world?" she mumbled. As she tore the paper, Alex went to Bobby's side, happily taking the hand he offered.

It was the old Army picture of Bobby, now in a frame. Celia smiled. "How sweet," she said. She looked over at him. "You always were a handsome devil."

"Devil, maybe," he joked.

They all sat together on the couch, and Bobby showed Alex the picture of Amanda.

"An accountant from the Federal Government showed up the other day," Celia told Bobby. "He said it may take a few months, but he'll be able to get my money back." She grabbed the business card off a table and handed it to him.

Bobby grinned. The accountant worked for the Department of Defense. Kenny had pulled some strings.

"You're married?" He asked, looking at the picture of Amanda again.

"Oh, not for a long time. We divorced when Amanda was in elementary school. He's a good Dad to her, so it's okay. I've been on my own a long time now. That's why I was so concerned when I couldn't find that money. I don't have anyone else to help me with my retirement, you know."

"I'm glad the Feds are going to take care of it for you," Alex said, hoping to keep Bobby from boiling over with guilt.

Celia smiled. "I'm sure they will." She looked over at Bobby, then at Alex. "You two seem very happy."

"Uh, we've… been friends a long time," Bobby explained. "She keeps me in line," he added, with a wink for Alex.

* * *

Hours later, at Bobby's place, after a satisfying meal they were packing up a game of cards. Alex watched him close the box around the deck and wrapped her arms around him as he tossed the deck onto the table. He returned the embrace and lowered his head, kissing her.

"How are you feeling?" She asked him.

"Ask me that in another hour," he said, his hands roaming up under her shirt.

She pushed his hands down gently. "I have an idea," she said. "Let's try it somewhere comfortable this time." She tugged on his hands and led him to the bedroom.

She sat down on the mattress and patted it so he would join her. He sat and immediately was all over her. His lips against her neck, his hands inside her shirt, fingers dipping up into her bra. He shivered when he felt her thumb graze across his lap.

The doorbell rang, and they both froze.

"Fuck!" Bobby whispered against her cheek. He pulled back and looked her in the eye. "Is cussing still allowed?"

"At a fucking time like this? Absolutely!" She said.

He laughed and gave her a quick kiss before heading back to the living room to answer the door. Alex wandered out behind him, wondering who it would be. She sighed when she saw him giving Kenny a hug. Alex folded her arms and sat on the couch while Bobby invited him in.

"Alex," Kenny said cordially.

"Song," she said.

Bobby picked up on the cool atmosphere between them. He offered Kenny a chair and sat beside Alex, throwing his left arm over her shoulders.

"It's good to see you up and around," Kenny said.

"I'm fine. I go back to work next week," Bobby told him.

"Good. New York needs its best detectives on the job." Song crossed his feet at the ankles and leaned back in the chair. "It's good to see you happy, too," he said. "Detective Eames, I know you don't think much of me, but I want you to know… I think very highly of you."

"Aw, Song…" She said, feeling a little guilty for holding a grudge.

Bobby knew exactly how she felt. "She's just mad because I got hurt. She'll get over it."

Alex gave him a look. "Maybe I'll direct my anger in the right place," she warned Bobby.

He read her face and nodded. Then he glanced quickly at Kenny. "She'll get over it," he said, followed by a yelp as she poked him in the ribs. He laughed.

"I'm headed overseas," Kenny announced. "I won't be back this way for a while, but I was wondering… Could I stop by when I come back?"

"Anytime," both Bobby and Alex said.

They stood and said their goodbyes, and Alex even managed a light hug for Agent Song. "Watch your ass," Bobby warned Kenny, and with a smile, he left.

Goren shut the door and turned back to Alex. "Where were we?" He asked.

"Somewhere comfortable," she said, and jogged off to the bedroom. He jogged after her and climbed right over her onto the bed, forcing her closer to the mattress with every deepening kiss.

The phone rang. "Fuck!" They both shouted in unison.

"Goren," he said, a touch of annoyance in his voice.

"Grumpy today, eh?" Logan asked.

"No. What the hell do you want, Logan?"

"I was just calling to see if you guys were up for drinks tonight."

"No."

"Aren't you at least gonna ask Alex? She might not like you making decisions for—"

"NO!" Alex shouted, loud enough for Logan to hear. Bobby smirked.

"Okay, all right, I'll talk to you later." He hung up and Goren turned the phone off before dropping it on the carpet.

Alex took his face in her hands and kissed him like she meant it. His hands were warm over her breasts and she arched against him. Making love on the bed proved to be way more comfortable than the floor or the couch had been.

Their sweaty bodies draped together, they panted quietly in the darkness afterward.

"I love you," Bobby said. He felt her lips touch the skin of his chest. "I saw you, you know."

"Saw me when?"

"When I got shot."

"I was there pretty soon after… we raided the place and—"

"No, that's not what I mean. I saw a… a vision… of you."

"A vision?" She thought for a minute. "You were losing a lot of blood. I guess—"

"No, Alex. It wasn't because of anything. I was dying, and I thought of you. That's all it was."

She wasn't sure why this made her want to cry. "That's all," she said, managing to stave off the tears.

"Because I love you." He explained. She reached her arms around him and he turned toward her and held her. He was happy to be alive, happy to be with her, and happy that he could tell her about it.

Alex was unable to speak. She pressed her head against his broad chest and took comfort in the sound of his heartbeat.

THE END

* * *

A/N Thank you all so much for reading my far-fetched tale! I appreciate all the supportive reviews. Remember, it's never too late to let me know what you thought!


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